PostHeaderIcon What makes a bad facebook poker player?

facebook-poker-chips

As with almost all things in this life, most people don’t like taking responsibility for their shortcomings or mistakes. Burn down your house? It’s the toasters fault. Crash your car? A dog ran across the road officer. Lose your job? Bankrupt a company? Cheat on your wife? Not my fault!”

It would seem that the same thing applies to facebook poker, no one likes to admit when they’re a bad player, so if they lose all their facebook poker chips it’s generally someone else’s fault.. so they say. They’ll blame it on other players, their internet connection, horrible luck, the alignment of the stars – anything to avoid having to admit that they might have played poorly or made a bad decision. Here are a few qualities of exceptionally bad poker players  which might be why they need to buy more facebook poker chips.

1) You hate math - At its most fundamental level, poker is a game all about numbers. What are your pot odds? How many outs do you have? What percentage of the pot should you raise when you have a good hand? These can all be answered with even the most basic level of statistical and mathematical knowledge, no more complicated than what you might learn in the 10th grade. But most people just refuse to use it, either from an inability to understand it or mental laziness. You don’t have to be a math genius to figure out that if you have a pocket pair you have a 1 in 8 chance of getting three of a kind on the flop. Knowing this would help you decide how many facebook poker chips to bet instead of just making blind raises.

2) You have no discipline - Ask the pros in poker what they believe their best quality to be and most of them will tell you it’s their discipline. Anyone can read a book about poker or watch the WSOP tournaments on television, but it takes strict discipline to win consistently at poker. If you can’t be discriplined at the poker tables, you’re susceptiple to spells of boredom that will cause you to call when you should fold, raise when you should check, etc. Without discipline any bad beat can easily put you on tilt and make you lose all your facebook poker chips.

3) You’re shortsighted - No I don’t mean you wear glasses or have contacts, but rather you can’t see the forest for the trees. In other words, you don’t plan for the long term. You may be great for those first 1000 hands of poker and maybe you can even win yourself a nice stack of facebook pokerchips to make you look like a bigshot. But what good is working for all those chips if you always sit at a table with your whole stack? You might convince yourself that you’d never go all in unless you have a royal flush, but emotions always tend to make people do illogical things at inopportune times. You may think you have the perfect hand and someone elses “more perfect” hand will knock you right on your ass. If you didn’t plan for the future and keep some chips on the side you are now broke and out of the game. Always keep some chips aside for a rainy day. Otherwise you’ll find yourself constantly scrambling to buy facebook poker chips again.

facebook-poker-fool

4)  You’re emotionally imballanced - This one is pretty straightforward. If you’re a little on the crazy side, if you’re prone to emotional outbursts, or have an overall dramatic personality, poker may not be the game for you. If you’re an emotional wreck in real life chances are you will carry this over to the poker table. You won’t be able to recognize when you’ve starting tilting and playing angry and you certainly won’t know when to stand up and walk away from the game and take a breather. Emotional players tend to play with an all or nothing mentality, for example “I’m either gonna win back all my facebook chips or go broke”. Emotions and poker don’t mix.

5) You can’t stand losing - This ties in with being emotionally imbalanced but it’s a very big factor of being a bad facebook poker player. If you feel that losing a hand is an insult to your ego or manhood or pride, then you should try playing shuffleboard instead. Losing is as much a part of poker as death is a part of life, it’s inevitable and it eventually happens to everyone, get used to it.

6) You need to see instant results - Patience is another quality bad texas holdem poker players lack. If they sit at a table and don’t flop a straight within 20 hands they start cursing their luck or going on about what a terrible night it is. If this sounds like you, then you might be a bad facebook poker player. You’d be better off renting a movie and cooling off a bit.

7) You hate chance – This is an important one, because lets face it, no matter how good you are or how many hands you’ve played or how many facebook poker chips you’ve won, at the end of the day chance and luck rule the field, especially in the short term. Are the players who win the world series of poker tournaments in las vegas the best players in the world? Of course not, but they’re all great players who happened to find a streak of luck and were able to use their skills to take advantage of that streak and make it to the top. Maybe the players who lost even played better than them and by all logical conclusions should have won, but logic and poker don’t always go hand in hand. Sometimes the donkey who calls with nothing will beat your flopped straight because he caught the flush on the river and ended up winning all your facebook poker chips.

If all these sound too familiar and you’re starting to think I might be talking about you, then maybe it’s time you starting taking the time to improve or change your playing style. Nobody want’s to be a facebook poker donkey.

facebook-poker-donkey

17 Responses to “What makes a bad facebook poker player?”

  • dany says:

    im very emotionally unbalanced but I think Im able to control it in facebook poker. although one time I had a really bad beat (lost with 4 queens to 4 10′s) and dropped like 90 million facebook chips in one hand and then after that it all went down hill and the dreaded tilt began. I ended up losing another 200 million chips before finally getting control over myself. Control is everything in no limit texas holdem poker

  • jeff says:

    discipline is the only way man, otherwise those facebook donkeys will nab every last one of your poker chips with their kamakaze play

  • tarel says:

    muahaha that man in picture is me when I play :]

  • Mati says:

    Yep, I agree, discipline is one of the most important things. I was in a pretty bad mood once, and I thought, “Ah, fuck it, lets go to 200k blind table with all my chips, maybe I’ll get lucky”. And yeah, I ended up from 9M to 0$. :D And all that, altough I was managing my bankroll good the past time, always played pretty secure, never got in tilt mode etc..

    One day after I began rebuilding my stack again, and after like 2 days I was over 1M again. Now I’m over 9M and won’t do such shit again. That was a lesson to my discipline.

  • manjumi says:

    losing all your facebook poker chips makes a bad poker player, end of case!

  • julius says:

    every one of these qualities sounds like my wife, I have to buy facebook poker chips for her on a weekly basis because she keeps losing them with bone headed moves like calling huge raises with pocket 55 or something like that. dont get married

  • jessa says:

    aren’t all facebook poker players bad? :]

  • porter says:

    facebook poker players are a universe unto themselves, although some of the higher tables have decent players I have to admit, and the gameplay is quite fun

  • tarkan says:

    most facebook poker players are donkeys if you ask me, they just call with Ace Anything

  • terry says:

    my wife is a bad facebook poker player and Im not ashamed of it

  • Terry says:

    This is a crock. Zynga poker is rigged so that you will lose and buy chips. It’s all about the MONEY. When you first start playing you win alot. They get you hooked so to say. Then you find yourself on horrible losing streaks all the time. This isn’t by chance. You are playing with Zynga bots and they don’t lose. The more you lose,Zynga is hoping you will buy chips. God forbid if you do,because as soon as you do you will experience the longest losing streak you have ever seen. Again the more you lose,the more Money they make.

  • Alan says:

    Terry is exactly right. Zynga poker is set-up with script formulas that run the game. There is no “randomness” at all. If you play long enough, and you’re used to paying attention to cards, you’ll begin to notice patterns that do not happen in the real world. In one hour of playing, I see more straights than I’ve ever seen occur in a year in the real world. If you get pocket face cards, the up cards are guaranteed to be numbers, usually leading to someone landing a straight. If you get pocket numbers, the winner will draw a pair or triple Aces Queens or Kings, or the ubiquitous straight. Every time. And like Terry pointed out, your “luck” is directly proportional to the amount of chips you have (bought). Got a stockpile? Plan for a losing streak. Lose 75% of that pile? You’ll enjoy a short winning streak; suddenly you can’t lose. Get down to 20,000 chips or lower, and you will have a devastating slide to bust, regardless of how disciplined you are. This is designed so that you’ll buy more chips. The only way to consistently build chips at Zynga’s Texas HoldEm Poker is to not play and let your daily chip allowance build up. I still play it because it’s sometimes fun, but I’ll never buy chips again. My strategy now is not to win the most, but to lose the least. This wont last, and as soon as my chips are gone I’m done.

    BTW, what’s up with all the Eastern European and Asian dudes always going all in on the first round? Like, every deal?

  • Annonymous says:

    Asian and Eastern European dudes do not buy chips. There is no point buying chips because it shows that you are not a good player. What is the point of playing poker. It is to accumulate the maximum number of chips. So of course we go all in in the first round because it is either bust or glory. If it’s bust we just participate in other activities. If it is glory, we have something to brag about. But at least most of us have the integrity not to buy chips because what is the point of accumulating so many chips if we do not win them by playing.

  • Branden says:

    I think i will have to agree with terry and alan; it seems as though there are certain spurts when all the ace kings, ace queens never win to the guy that has the 2,5. Another one I notice is zygna will give three different people pocket pairs then a flush willcome up.

    I understand chance; I am taking stats 2, in a Ph.D. progam right now, however, as stated in the post above mine, the new guys, and the people with hardly no chips win more; especially on stupid hands. I bet statistically if you were to run an ANOVA on the percentage of hands won as your (DV) and your levels obtained as your (IV), 5 catigories: (Lev 1) 1-10, (Lev 2) 10-25, (Lev 3) 25-40, (Lev 4) 40-60, (Lev 5) 60-100. I bet you would find significant mean differences between the 1 level and level 2,3,4.

    not completely sure, but I bet, not a poker pun, that you would.

  • YO U ARE A STUPID BASTARD says:

    ZYNGA POKER IS RIGGED YOU STUPID BASTARD!

  • Lol seriously says:

    I don”t know if you”re being paid by zynga poker To write this condescending and apathetic article or if you have never played a real poker game… Anyone who can calculate odds know this game is rigged, in different ways than you think. (also the fact that they only use “play” money so they don’t invest in a good pseudo probability calculator).

    Try playing a round of poker stars, or a real poker game, the way you play zynga poker…you will almost definitely lose..
    Also You mIght want to research how zynga has been successfully sued multiple times for scammng people.

    Typed this crap on an iPhone.

    Yes, play zynga poker for fun but for serious players like myself, the game can become infuriating.
    And please don”t be so close minded to immediately denounce my comment as just a sore player.

  • Lol seriously says:

    Lol this website is so fishy. Love the bolded “facebook chips” never mentionng which poker application.

    “you dont want to be a facebook donkey do you?” such a bad writer, trying to establish a non existant social norm and build off peoples fears ..

    Who is paying you to make these poorly written articles that attempts to brainwash us with failing attempt at misdirection ??

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